Jacob: [running down hallway] Mom!
Rachel: [in bathroom, blowing nose] Yes Jake.
Jacob: I need you.
Rachel: Ok. Why do you look upset?
Jacob: [pointing toward living room] Because I thought I heard noise out there. Like an “oooh” noise.
Rachel: Ok. Was it on tv?
Jacob: No. I need you to check the stairs to make sure there’s not a monkey there.

How on earth does he come up with this stuff?

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